Prototypes of Intimacy and Distance in Same-Sex and Opposite-Sex Relationships

Abstract

Differences between men's and women's conceptions of intimacy and distance may be a source of misunderstanding and conflict in close relationships. Although there is already an extensive literature on sex differences in intimacy, the meaning of the findings is somewhat unclear because each set of authors adopts a unique operational definition of intimacy. Often, this definition has been affected by the tendency to equate intimacy with self-disclosure. Distance (the opposite of intimacy, if intimacy is conceptualized as closeness) has been left largely unexplored in previous research and its relation to intimacy is unclear. In the present study, the components of intimacy and distance were delineated by asking men and women to describe an intimate and a distant experience with a member of the opposite sex and a member of the same sex. Prototypes were constructed by submitting the features mentioned in each kind of experience to hierarchical cluster analysis. The results revealed more similarities than differences between men's and women's conceptions of intimacy and distance. A conceptualization of intimacy emerged with a focus on appreciation and affection rather than self-disclosure. Distance appeared to revolve around dissatisfaction with and disapproval of the partner. Analyses of variance on specific features revealed sex differences and relationship differences that were consistent with previous research. Sex differences in the description of distance reflected the status or power differential between men and women.